It has almost been exactly two years since my life blew up.
In an instant I lost almost everything: my closest friends, my job, my income, my purpose, my ministry, my home, my church and my faith community. I also lost my reputation, respect and any status I might have had. All of it. In an instant.
If you have never experienced that, imagine holding your face in front of a fire hydrant and then just letting the water go… it feels something like that.
You can’t breath, you can’t think, you can’t do anything.
It sucks. No other way to say it. No way to pretend otherwise.
It is now two years later. This weekend, I am graduating from culinary school.
There is a lot to reflect upon from these last two years.
I have to say that as things settled a few weeks after the life-explosion, culinary school wasn’t on my radar at all.
I thought about going back to seminary. Getting another ministry job in a more progressive church. I thought about law school and even bought a bunch of LSAT books. I thought about professional retail/sales. Full time development work for non-profits. Driving off a cliff.
Those were all options.
I honestly didn’t even think about culinary school until my younger sister said, “why don’t you go to culinary school?” And instantly, that made sense. Nothing else was clicking. But culinary school… that I could do.
So it has been a long two years… finding a job, a new church home, a new place to live, developing new friendships. A long and hard two years.
Next week, I am going to post some reflections and lessons from these past two years. As well as some thoughts about what the next stage of life might be like for me.
But for now, I am just going to get ready for work, clean my apartment for my folks and sister/bro-in-law who are coming for graduation, and enjoy Sunday’s festivities.
More reflections next week…
Ben Dubow
May 14, 2011 at 2:47 pm
Thanks Nancy! ?I do believe very much that Romans 8:28 is true and that me being at RFC and the relationships I have built and will build there are part of that promise and God's graceful providence.<div><br></div><div> And I agree re. teens and getting bad advice… in many respects, once was set off on that path, some blow up was inevitable. ?And my heart aches for so many teens who are misdirected and misguided by well-meaning but wrong adults in their lives…?</div> <div><br></div><div>Thanks for everything Nancy!</div><div><br></div><div>BD<br><br></div>
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